Source:
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THE FIRST FAST

By Nasheet Jaffer Khan, Community Solutions Editor and Rayeesa Absal, Binsal Abdul Kader, Staff Reporters
Published: August 20, 2009, 23:05


The first Ramadan fast is a rite of passage for most young Muslims. It is their first glimpse into adulthood and the responsibilities that are bestowed upon every Muslim. While the age at which it comes varies, for some children it comes from a need to test one’s patience while for others it is a need to “grow up”.

Muslim's Duty

Fasting in the month of Ramadan is the fourth of the five pillars of Islam, which include the profession of faith, prayers, distribution of alms and pilgrimage to Makkah, the Haj. The month is the ninth in the lunar, or Hijri, calendar and Muslims are obliged to fast each day of the month during daylight hours. Fasting includes abstention from food, drink, smoking, sexual acts as well as any bad habits such as profanity. This is meant to purify the soul of the Muslim.

A milestone in life

Having never fasted before, this Ramadan will be a milestone in the life of Abdullah Gassan Al Masri, as he is about to take a small step to becoming a “grown-up.”
“I have never fasted in my life. So it is not going to be easy. But I know I will be able to do it,” 9-year-old Al Masri confidently said. Al Masri is a Palestinian studying in Grade 3 at Abu Dhabi’s ABC School.

He said he is excited that he will be fasting this year just like the grown-ups do in his family. “Until now, I only knew the traditions that we follow during Ramadan by seeing it. This time, I can also experience it so it is going to be much more exciting. I feel like a grown-up already.”

“God asked us to fast during Ramadan, so we must follow it,” he said.

He is planning to start fasting one step at a time until he is able to do a full day’s fast. His parents have asked him to fast until noon on the first day, then for a few days he will fast until after the afternoon prayers and finally when he feels up to it, he will fast until sunset like the rest of his family. This is the routine way in which kids in his family are trained to fast, he has been told.

“I will spend as much time as possible in prayers and by reading the Quran,” he added.

As his school reopens on September 6, Al Masri says fasting will become tougher then. “Since it is really hot and I come back on the school bus, it will be hard. But I will fast for as many days as possible.”

He usually goes swimming during the weekends and hopes to continue during Ramadan.

Many of his cousins and friends have already had their first fasting experience. “Now it is my turn to go through the experience,” he said.

Recognising a pillar of faith

Having prepared for her first Ramadan fast, nine-year-old Palestinian Ayah Maher Al Gafraawi believes she’s prepared to fulfil one of the pillars of her religion and start fasting.
“I’m eagerly waiting for Ramadan to begin. This year would be very special for me because it would be the first time I fast”, Ayah said, her voice filled with excitement. Ayah studies in grade 5 at the Giggles English School in Abu Dhabi.

Asked why she decided to fast this year, she says: “It is very important to fast during Ramadan, as our religion tells us to do so. My parents helped me understand the true meaning of the month and they encouraged me to do my part.

“I hope that some of my friends are also fasting for their first time. This way I will have company,” she added.

Ayah said her parents have been helping her prepare ahead of the “big day”. “Last week, I tried going without food and water from morning until about 3pm. So, now I feel confident that I can fast.” She is familiar with the do’s and don’ts while fasting such as not getting into a fight with anyone, not using bad words and so on, she said.

“I’m usually very active in sports and outdoor activities, especially swimming. I’m not sure if I can keep this up but I will take it in the stride and try to do my best”, she said.
“I hope to change my routine to suit my energy level while I am fasting”, she added.

Ayah said her family arranges many get-togethers and visits to relatives that she enjoys during the month.

“But most of all, I hope to do as much charity as I can this Ramadan and help poor people. That is the task that I set for myself,” she said.

Ramadan means time with family


Had her mother not stopped her, Samia Nasser would have probably failed in her “test fast”.

“I had planned to fast this Ramadan and therefore observed two fasts, as part of practice to help me through the month. During the fast, I almost drank some water…my mother stopped me and reminded me that I was fasting. It was a close call,” 11-year-old Samia said.

Samia’s mother Kauser Nas agreed. She should know, as she has celebrated 23 Ramadans in the UAE and has seen two children go through the “fasting process”.

Nas said: “Ramadan is important. There is a time for everything and we [the family] agreed that Samia should start fasting now, since she is old enough now and is disciplined.”

While Ramadan holds a lot of significance for the Bangladeshi family, there is an additional reason why Samia is looking forward to fasting for the first time. She said: “My family and I hardly get any time to eat together. However, during Ramadan I will be able to sit with them for iftar and suhoor, which is great. I love spending time with my family.”

As part of her “support plan”, Samia’s mother intends to treat her daughter to special food items. “Samia’s father and I have planned to either buy or cook her favourite food, at least for the first five days of Ramadan. We have never given any materialistic gifts to our children to encourage them to fast… fasting is necessary and we must follow it as Muslims,” Kauser said.

Samia has support in the form of her friends, who started fasting in 2008. “I wasn’t ready to fast last year but I am now. I understand that if I fast Allah will be happy with me and will bless us all,” she said.

'I know I can do it'

He lives life by his rules. The reason why six-year-old Aba’an Khan chose to end a fast half way through the day, on a recent “trial” run.

“My wife and I had decided to observe a fast to mark the occasion of Shab E Bara’at (Laylatul Bara’ah or the night preceding the 15th day of Sha’aban), recently. Aba’an probably caught on the enthusiasm and decided to fast with us. By afternoon, the next day, he declared that he would not go on and wanted to end the fast. “That’s typical Aba’an he knows exactly what he wants and is quite manipulative, too,” Indian expatriate Hesham Khan, Aba’an’s father, said.

This Ramadan, however, Aba’an has vowed to keep his word. He said: “I am ready to fast this year and I am really excited about it. Everyone does it and I know I can do it, too.”
As per tradition, Aba’an will be following in the footsteps of his older brother, who had observed his first fast at the age of seven, too. This was 11 years ago. How does the Khan family intend to support their younger son this Ramadan?

“Encouragement always helps, but it’s important that Aba’an does not get exhausted. I want him to do everything in a normal manner, but I would advise him to play less, especially outdoors,” Khan said.

As a source of encouragement, Hesham and his wife Diba have planned a surprise for their son on the first day of Ramadan.
“We have decided to invite a few friends and family for iftar, to boost Aba’an’s confidence and celebrate. Such things encourage children, in addition to making them feel important, too. We want Aba’an to realise the significance of Ramadan. He must know we value his effort,” Khan added.

A chance to learn a lesson in empathy

Why must some children die of hunger? Nine-year-old Hadi Jaber wants to know the answer.

“My parents say that by fasting I will be able to understand what these children go through. I saw this documentary on TV once where some children had died because they could not have food. It made me cry. Children shouldn’t suffer. I hope to understand this by fasting for the first time this year,” Jaber said.

His mature approach to life holds no surprises for Jaber’s father, Mohammad Jaber.

“Hadi always acts his age and is very independent and observant of his surroundings. When he was six years old, he would watch me praying and secretly emulate the various positions and postures,” the father, a Lebanese expatriate, said.

So what does Ramadan signify for the son?

“My sister fasted last year. If I can fast the entire day, I can do anything. This is a tough thing to do,” he said. “I don’t know whether Hadi will be able to observe all the fasts for the entire day, but I do know that he won’t miss iftar!” the father said.

He added that observing the fasts should not be tough since: “Hadi has practised fasting once”.

“For some reason Hadi believed that he did not have to move while fasting and just sat in the corner all day. My wife and I explained to him that this was not how it was supposed to be done,” the father said.

He added that it was important to show children how to do something instead of just telling them.

“People believe that we must get down to a child’s level in order to explain something. This is not true. On the contrary, we need to rise up to their level of purity and innocence,” he said.

There can only be one winner

There can only be one winner this Ramadan and Hamdan Khalid Al Obaidli wants to be the one. “Hamdan has a lot of cousins his age. To encourage them to fast longer we hold a competition — the one who fasts the longest takes the prize. It’s something we do to support the children,” Fatima Khalid Al Obaidli, Hamdan’s mother said.

Seven-year-old Hamdan is the second of four children and the most creative according to Fatima. “This will be the first time Hamdan will be fasting. When he wouldn’t fast, he would make handmade gifts and cards to distribute among relatives during Ramadan. He always likes to see everyone happy,” she said.

To help her children observe the fast, Fatima usually starts them early on a two-hour fast and increases the duration as the days approach. She said: “Fasting should be easier this year as schools are closed. However, even if it wasn’t, Hamdan had already informed me that he was interested in fasting this year.”

While relatives believe that Hamdan will end his first fast before sunset, owing to the fact that he’s impatient and gets easily bored, he said otherwise. “I listen to the stories [Islamic] my grandparents tell me and I want to be just strong as the heroes in the story. I have seen everyone in my family fast all these years and my brother fasted last year, too. I am excited to try,” Hamdan said.

Fatima added that it was important for her children to learn the importance of Ramadan from an early age. She said: “As parents we must make our children aware. By fasting, Hamdan can learn to be patient and feel for the poor. His first fast will open the doors for all the Ramadans he will experience.”


Remembering their first time

I couldn’t complete the fast on the first day because I was too hungry. Seeing my helplessness, my parents permitted me to break the fast, but insisted that I should not repeat it. They said that if I started fasting I had to complete it. So the very next day, I fasted successfully. I realised it was good for health. So I continue this habit every year.
Syed Mohammad Sadath,
35, Airport counter staff from India

My parents were very strict about fasting so I was totally dedicated during Ramadan. That was good, so that I could really enjoy Ramadan and fasting became a very good habit. I still remember various delicious dishes prepared by my mother during Ramadan. Apart from the dishes, too many interesting things were there during Ramadan.”
Mohammad Tarek
38, Clerk from Pakistan

Being too hungry, I had eaten some food secretly on my first day of fasting. I was just 6 years old so I could not bear the hunger. But later, when I completed a full day of fast, I felt I had grown up like adults. I felt I was also a big man.”
Abdul Altif,
37, Aircraft technician from Ethiopia

My first fast was an experiment as suggested by my parents. I was 6-year-old and my parents told me to try fasting till afternoon. I still remember my first Iftar. Special dishes made Ramadan sweeter. There was no TV in my village in those days so we used to play all day. Everybody in the locality would be together. Now there is no communication, and people are living in their own boxes.”
Rashad Eisa,
50, Teacher from Jordan

As a child, it was hard to fast the first time. I was seven-year-old and the day was long, since it was summer. But after ending the fast, I felt it was a good achievement. And Iftar was nice because all my relatives and friends got together. Ramadan marked togetherness during those days. So I and other children would wait for Ramadan every year.”
Abdullah Al Nuaimi
45, Emirati manager at a telecommunication company

My first fast was very difficult because of the scorching heat during the Egyptian summer. Still, I enjoyed that Ramadan because of the school vacation. I was 10-year-old and like any other child, I was playing outside all the day. Although I was too tired after Iftar, I had a sense of satisfaction. I felt I had achieved something. It was also nice to play after the prayers at night.”
Mohammad Abdul Maguid,
32, health and safety coordinator, Egypt

Nice one blossoms. I dont remember anything about my first fast. Me and my younger sis had this craze of fasting coz we would see elders doing it. So we would bet with each other on who can keep more fasts. We started fasting even when they were not farz on us. We both always ended up keeping around 25 fasts minimum everytime in Ramadan until they became farz on us